PODCAST: Season 7, Episode 43
Have you ever received an email, a piece of client feedback or even a simple “I can’t afford it” and felt your whole body react before your brain has had a chance to catch up?
Your chest goes prickly. Your stomach drops. You replay the conversation. You start questioning your pricing, your offer, your decisions, maybe your entire bloody business.
But does the size of your reaction actually tell you the size of the problem?
In this episode of The Rebellious Leader, I’m exploring what happens when someone else’s reaction becomes evidence about us, and what happens when our emotional response starts making business decisions.
I share a personal story about receiving a refund request from a former client 18 months after we’d finished working together, despite having ended on good terms and achieved strong results together.
My immediate response wasn’t calm, strategic consideration.
It was:
“Oh my God. What have I done wrong?”
And that distinction matters.
Because there was a business situation to deal with.
And there was my emotional reaction to it.
They weren’t the same problem.
We’ll look at why a client saying “I can’t afford it” can lead us to add more to an already good offer, why one no can suddenly have us questioning our entire business, and how our attempts to avoid rejection, criticism or disappointment can quietly start shaping our strategy.
I also share a recent client example where being challenged created a huge physical and emotional response, even though once we’d examined what had happened, she still stood by the decision she’d made.
The goal wasn’t to make her stop caring.
It was to help her find a more neutral place where she could check the feedback, take responsibility for anything that genuinely belonged to her, and leave the rest.
Because taking someone seriously doesn’t require you to agree with them.
How to Handle Client Criticism in Your Business
- Why someone else’s reaction is information, not proof that you’ve done something wrong
- How criticism, rejection and client feedback can trigger disproportionate emotional reactions in business owners
- The difference between an emotional response and the actual business problem
- Why “I can’t afford it” doesn’t automatically mean your pricing is wrong
- How rejection can lead founders to unnecessarily change offers, messaging and strategy
- Why feelings are useful information, but shouldn’t become instructions
- How to take feedback without automatically adopting someone else’s version of events
- Why the alternative to taking everything personally isn’t “not giving a shit”. It’s discernment
- How to separate what needs to change in the business from what needs attention in you
- A five-question Rebellious Leader Audit to help you make decisions from evidence rather than reaction
The Rebellious Leader Audit
Think about the last time something in your business created a much bigger reaction than perhaps the situation warranted.
Ask yourself:
1. What actually happened?
Strip away the interpretation and stick to the facts.
2. What did I make it mean?
What conclusion did you add about yourself, your offer, your pricing or your business?
3. What did that meaning make me want to do?
Defend? Explain? Discount? Add more? Over-deliver? Change the decision? Burn the whole bloody thing down?
4. What useful job was my reaction trying to do?
Was it trying to prevent rejection, keep somebody happy, stop you making a mistake or prove you’re good at what you do?
5. If neither their reaction nor mine gets to make the decision, what would I decide from the actual evidence?
Your Rebellious Decision
This week, notice the gap between what happened and what you made it mean.
Before you change the price, rewrite the offer, add another bonus or send the seventeen-paragraph explanation, ask:
What do I actually know here?
You don’t need to become someone who gives zero shits.
You can feel the reaction. Hear the feedback. Check yourself. Take what’s useful.
And still decide what you think.
Someone else’s reaction is information.
Your reaction is information.
Neither gets to make the decision.
Mentioned in this episode
Lucy Legal: Contract templates for business owners
I mention the importance of having proper contracts and structure in place so you’re not relying purely on an emotional response when difficult client situations arise.
Keep going
📖 Read The Rebellious Leader by Mills Gray
A business book for women done playing by the rules.
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